Healthy Living DIY

I hate to be the wet blanket here, but you have those feelings for a very good reason. According to Antonio Damasio, author of The Feeling of What Happens , feelings have a critically important role in our consciousness and awareness.

It's entirely likely that your feelings may provide your first clue that something in your environment needs your attention - and fast. Specifically, feelings often alert you to the presence of danger. For your safety, it's far more desirable to acknowledge them rather than merely blow them off or sweep them under the rug.

The trick is learning to quickly assess the source of the feelings. Can you identify where they're coming from? In this reader's case, the example she shared was situation-specific. She's changing a behavior that hasn't served her well in the past, she knows what it is, and it's uncomfortable.

When this happens to you, as it inevitably will if you're committed to improving your quality of life, it is reassuring to know that it's normal. You're up against some kind of false survival instinct that would have you think you'll perish if you challenge your comfort zone. In truth, the only thing that's likely to perish is your old, dysfunctional way of life.

There's excellent news ahead.

Generally, once you successfully challenge the belief, you'll be pleasantly surprised to realize that you didn't perish. In fact, you might feel ... well, actually kind of good about what happened as a result. The next time a similar situation comes up, your palms won't be quite as sweaty, because you'll have the memory of that favorable experience to draw on.

The best way to get rid of the feelings, then, is to challenge that particular aspect of your comfort zone sufficiently that the new behavior becomes more comfortable. At which point, you'll be more comfortable, you'll move on to some new challenge, and probably another case of sweaty palms.

In the meanwhile, however, there are a few little tricks you can use:

1. Distance yourself from the immediacy of the feelings by becoming an observer of what's happening. In other words, start a little dialog with yourself, as though you were observing your experience from a distance. "Oh, I notice that my palms are getting sweaty. How interesting." "Nausea. Fascinating! I wonder how long this is going to last?"
2. Stay focused the result you're committed to producing. Re-read the story [that you received after you signed up for the Healthy Living Update ] about Mike and his experience at Wally's Widget Wonderland.
3. Consciously manage your state.

Please note that it's not at all necessary to feel comfortable doing something in order to derive the benefit from it. Sometimes you need to, as author Susan Jeffers says, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway .

By the way, do make sure you're able to identify the source of your discomfort, at least in a general sense, before you make the choice to proceed.

Every now and then, you'll hear a story about someone who got caught up in a situation where their common sense should have stopped them before they got into trouble. You can bet that the person in this situation discounted some feelings they shouldn't have - and simply made the inappropriate choice to proceed anyway.

Finally, if your feelings of discomfort are so strong that you can't function or are extremely troubled, please consult a counselor or therapist for personal support in working through your situation a little more gently.