Did you ever notice that there are certain people a bully won't go near? Whether we're talking about human bullies or selective events (like illness), some people seem to be more vulnerable than others.
* One person attracts partner after partner who berates her. Another attracts none.
* One person is plagued by "unlucky" events. Another seems to live under a cloud of protection
* One person attracts illness after illness. Another attracts none.
And so on.
What's the difference? And how can you be more like the guy behind door #2?
In this post, we'll look at one simple solution you can begin to implement right away. That solution is modeling. Let's consider 3 simple steps.
1. Identify your model. If your 7-year-old is getting beat up on the playground, ask him to identify one kid that bully would never go near. If you're in poor health, identify someone who radiates vitality. If your partner is a jerk, identify someone who's found "Mr. or Ms. Right."
Your model can be someone you know personally or not. It could be a fictional character, a public figure, or someone from history.
2. Notice how they go about their life. If you can observe them, great. If not, your mind will still give you some good answers.
* How does he carry himself (posture)?
* What does she think about?
* How does he interact with the important people in his life?
* What's the first thing she does each morning?
* What state will he most likely be in when he's addressing a challenge?
3. Adopt the same mannerisms yourself. Think like he thinks. Carry yourself like she does. Start the day with a few minutes of inspirational reading or journaling.
Find a person your bully wouldn't touch. Model the characteristics that make them bully-proof. Pretty soon, things will be going a lot better on your end!
Special note: Have patience with this process, though. It may take a short time for it to work. As you begin to change your behavior, it's just possible that the bully will re-double his efforts to get through to you.
Don't panic. It's just a test. Continue to demonstrate that you know your stuff and you'll pass with flying colors!
Elizabeth Eckert can help you explore how simple everyday choices create health — or undermine even the best of intentions. With a background that ranges from energy medicine to structural bodywork to developmental psychology, this "Stick-To-It Coach" has the experience to support you in creating the healthiest possible expression of — you!
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