Several years ago I was a therapist participant in a research study exploring the effectiveness of neuromuscular therapy on chronic severe headaches. One of our participants was a young woman of 23 who'd had unrelenting head pain since she'd hit her head falling out of a wagon at age 5.
Her first session with me produced what was arguably one of the worst therapeutic outcomes I've ever generated in a single therapy session. Yet the new strategy we used during her second session reduced her head pain, by her description, about 50%. It was the first positive change she had seen in 18 years. (During the course of the study, she improved even more.)
What inspired her to come back for that second session? Not just to be physically present, but to arrive relaxed and receptive enough that we were able to turn the tides and produce a positive outcome?
Some friends of mine are in the process of moving. They closed on their new house before they'd ever even listed the home they'd been living in. You know the season of the year we're in. You know that the real estate market is a bit slow for sellers all over the country.
These people sold their old house at a price they were satisfied with inside of three days. What could account for their quick and painless sales process?
Earlier this week, I posted a scenario over on the Healthy Living Community Forum about the results of two gardeners. The first guy, secure in the knowledge that his favorite strategy produces great results, practices it with gusto. The second guy grumbles and gripes that the first guy is all wet and his methods "don't work in the real world."
What might account for two gardeners trying out approximately the same strategy and getting completely different results?
In each case, the answer is the same. It's expectation.
My favorite dictionary, www.m-w.com, says that to expect is "to consider probable or certain."
The young woman with the headaches was sure we would be able to help her. Her positive expectation caused her to show up relaxed and receptive, even after she'd experienced a less-than-desirable reaction on the previous visit. "I knew you'd think of something else," she said.
The happy homesellers were more concerned about getting stuck without a place to live than worried about having two homes on their hands. So they waited until the deal was cinched on the second place before they ever considered selling the first one.
Gardener #1 knew his strategy worked. Gardener #2 was sure it wouldn't. Turns out they were both right. It worked for the guy that believed in it, and the other guy got less than ideal results. Both gardeners got exactly what they expected.
What do you expect from the key situations in your life?
What do you base your expectations on?
- The last time you tried something similar and it failed? Or the new learning you've applied in the meantime?
- The last time you tried something similar and it succeeded? Or the preparations you've made for today's unique situation?
Positive expectation, grounded in reality, can be a great friend!
Elizabeth Eckert can help you explore how simple everyday choices create health — or undermine even the best of intentions. With a background that ranges from energy medicine to structural bodywork to developmental psychology, this "Stick-To-It Coach" has the experience to support you in creating the healthiest possible expression of — you!
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