Country singer Keith Urban and I, though we've never met, have something very important in common. We both share the opinion that healthy communication is a key ingredient in creating healthy lives.
Mr. Urban, a Grammy-winning country singer, made what I consider an extremely powerful observation the other day. He's in rehab for substance abuse. And he's got some advice for anyone dealing with addictive behavior.
Here's how it works. When you feel like your life is out of control, it's only natural to attempt to either enforce control on it in some way -- or, if that doesn't work, to numb yourself to the pain of the conflict and chaos.
Chaos. Doesn't that sound familiar?
If you've been hanging around WordCures.com for very long, it should. Chaos is one of the 6 major stress-makers we introduce in the Transform Stress Into Power health guide.
To carry Urban's point forward, I'd like to briefly explore three ways that communication and addiction interact.
1. Urban's main point was this. When you begin to think "I should be able to handle this all myself" that's a sure sign you're getting in over your head. Reach out for support.
He's right on the money. When you are handling things well yourself, you're not thinking "I should be able to deal with this." The only time that phrase runs through your head is when you're not coping. Point for Urban!
2. Yet some types of addiction surface differently. Sometimes the addiction serves to distract. From what? This one is so obvious you're gonna laugh. From yourself. What do you suppose is with all this busy-ness around us? People compulsively run around, work on stuff, caretake, and give to others for one simple reason. To avoid looking at themselves in the mirror.
If this sounds like you, do yourself a favor. Take the weekend off. Go someplace quiet (even if it's your own living room.) Take nothing but a notebook and pen. Get to know yourself. (This is fine communication!)
3. Finally, recognize that your actions speak louder than your words. (In fact, over at WordCures.com we explore 4 natural languages you use every day!) When you're living a compulsive lifestyle, whether that compulsion is legal or illegal, it's obvious to those around you. Denial is a wonderful thing. But awareness is ever so much more fun!
Try this on for size. Communicate balance, wisdom, and health. You'll feel great!
Elizabeth Eckert can help you explore how simple everyday choices create health — or undermine even the best of intentions. With a background that ranges from energy medicine to structural bodywork to developmental psychology, this "Stick-To-It Coach" has the experience to support you in creating the healthiest possible expression of — you!
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