Healthy Living DIY

What if change itself isn't the problem?

• If your finances are a disaster, don't you want more available cash? That's a desired change.
• If you're ill, don't you want to be healthy? That's a desired change.
• If your product isn't selling, don't you want more sales? A desired change.
• If your back hurts, don't you want to become pain-free? A desired change.
• If you're hungry, don't you want to stop for lunch? Another desired change.

As I see it, then, most of us are striving for change in one area of our lives or another most of the time. Do you perceive that it would be painful to be rich, healthy, master of a successful creative product, pain-free, and satisfied? Most of us would not. In fact, most of us perceive that life would be grand under those circumstances!

I'd like to propose that we are not, in fact, afraid of change. Most of the time, we do not even perceive change as painful.

Instead, I propose, what we fear and resist is the unknown.

If there was a guaranteed formula to health, wealth, loving relationships, and peace of mind, we'd surely all have followed it by now. But there is no forumla. John can tell you how he got rich. Jane can tell you how she got healthy. They can both tell you how great their relationship is.

But what they did may not be replicatable by you. In fact, what's more likely the case is that John and Bill both tell you how they got rich -- John in real estate and Bill by day-trading the stock market.

Jane and Susan both got healthy. Jane's a vegan and Susan swears by the Omega 3's she gets from eating massive amounts of salmon. Neither one of them exercises, but their friend Kelli, also a vegan, does and she was just diagnosed with breast cancer.

In other words, there isn't just one way to get the result. Sometimes, following what appears to be the same course yields different results for different people. And therein lies the problem.

Sometimes, we just don't know what to do!

So we ask around, do the research, and set out on the course that looks like it will pay off. We invest heavily of our time, energy, attention, and perhaps money. We get lukewarm results, perhaps, at first. And then Sam comes along and tells us we're doing it all wrong. "Do what I say," Sam advocates, "and you'll make it big. It worked for me!" Yet you hesitate.

Is it the change you're afraid of? Heck no. You'd love to have the success Sam has. What you're afraid of is chucking your mental, emotional, and financial investment in doing something the best way you know -- in favor of something completely foreign, totally different, and absolutely unknown.

If you find yourself in this situation, and I suggest that from time to time we all do, then here are a few questions that may help you straighten things out.

1. Why did you choose the course you're on? Was it researched, studied, and contemplated? Or is it your "default" option? "Default," when it's not producing the results you desire, may not be your best choice.

2. Have you given your course a fair shot? The average seedling takes a couple weeks to germinate, even under ideal circumstances. Your strategy may simply need more time.

3. Why are you resisting the proposed change? Yes, ask yourself the question. If your answer is anything in the neighborhood of "I don't want to be told wnat to do" or "I just want my way to be right," then ... well, do I really need to tell you that those aren't the best reasons?

Bottom line is this: If you've set out on a "default" course of action and it's not producing the results you want, the risk of trying something new (even if it's completely unknown) may be well worth the potential benefit. Just do a simple risk assessment to find out. (What's at risk; what's the potential gain; what's the worst that could happen?)

To be continued -- Does fear of the unknown hamper your friendships?