Commitment to healing (or its lack) is a perpetuating factor that sometimes trips people up. When I say "sometimes," what I really mean is that it's one of the most frequent conflicts I observe in people from day to day.
Of course that does not mean that people don't want to be healthy. Most people do! What it means is that there's something else that they also want, the two desires conflict, and the health-building process effectively "stalls in the water."
Before we get into that list of possible conflicting desires (it's coming), let's look at this a little differently. What would it look like if someone with very few conflicting desires were to step through the door? How would the engagement go? What would be the results?
I had the pleasure of meeting such a person about two weeks ago. He phoned on a Monday morning to inquire about an appointment. When I asked about his availability, he responded "I'm really tired of this pain." Already, I suspected that things were going to go well. He was focused and flexible!
Such a person, clear on their priorities and commitments, has an amazing ability to mold his environment. As it so happens, I had an opening in an hour. He found a way to make it work and arrived right on time.
Fortunately, this gentleman was not dealing with a long-term problem. Something had happened a couple weeks prior and he'd sustained an injury. Had he not found a solution it might have become a chronic problem, but at the stage when he arrived here his pain -- while intense -- was fairly recent. That was a good thing!
After the first treatment, the gentleman reported that he'd felt some improvement. That was obvious, of course, because his demeanor had changed. I could see he felt better. He was relieved, especially since I was the third practitioner he'd visited in an attempt to resolve this thing.
The gentleman wanted to know how soon he could come back for another treatment. "Is tomorrow too soon?" he asked. "Or would it be better to wait until Wednesday?"
Long story short, he came in twice more that week and once again the following week. Four times. At that point, his problem was substantially improved. Unless something else happens, I probably won't see him again for a while.
I've been seeing clients on a full-time basis for the relief of musculoskeletal pain problems for upwards of 15 years, having worked in the field for another 5 years before that. This engagement was not typical. Here are several things this particular gentleman did that made things work out so well...
* He immediately prioritized the follow-up visits in his schedule and got himself back quickly, allowing us to build on the improvment he had realized in the first treatment.
* He assumed financial responsibility for the treatments as being necessary to his well-being.
* He asked about what he might do to support the treatment on his own and followed through between visits.
* He arrived for all of his follow-up visits right on schedule.
* I never saw nor heard a cell phone. (I assume he has one.) He focused on the task at hand -- the treatment -- and let whatever else might have been going on in his life wait.
* Interestingly, his intention was so clear that all the appointments he needed were open in my schedule!
I suspect that some people, reading about this engagement, might think that the man was lucky. Leading a charmed life. Retired, perhaps, or independently wealthy.
The answer is no. He is a businessman with a hefty responsibility load. Where he differs from most people is in his vision and commitment. "What do we need to do to make this work?" he seems to be asking himself continuously. And then he follows through.
I get to meet the most interesting people!
Everyone has their strengths, of course, and that means you. Yet perhaps you would like to increase your commitment to healing. Perhaps you're searching for more efficient or consistent results. Here are some things to watch for.
Checklist of desires that may conflict with healing intent:
* Desire to put other people's needs, wants, and projects before your own.
* Desire to maintain an old disempowering story about your life. It might start out something like this, "Nothing I want ever comes through anyway. I guess I'm just not lucky like other people..."
* Desire to follow the strategy that seems "easiest" or "hardest" (depending on your outlook) rather than the strategy that seems most likely to deliver your desired result.
* Desire to continue doing things the way you've always done them rather than re-evaluating for changing conditions.
And one more thing...
* Willingness to accept what you think you can get rather than what you really want.
Ok. You are ready to go! You are powerful, clear and focused. Watch for conflicting desires, resolve them, and live from your commitment to wholeness.
Sometimes, of course, that goes more easily with support. That's why we offer wellness coaching. Think about it if you've been having difficulty getting this down on your own.
Elizabeth Eckert can help you explore how simple everyday choices create health — or undermine even the best of intentions. With a background that ranges from energy medicine to structural bodywork to developmental psychology, this "Stick-To-It Coach" has the experience to support you in creating the healthiest possible expression of — you!
Take our free Less Stress; More Time mini-course!